« Prev 1 2 Next » Reply Share Thread Facebook Twitter Tumblr LinkedIn MySpace Email Go to Previous Thread Next Thread Please make a selection first Author Topic: ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` (Read 851 times) aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 21, 2009 18:36:59 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Not bothering with a shut down Aleece merely pulled the power cord out from the side of the laptop and grabbed the bag to put it away. Really that had been all she wanted for now, and until she had a better grasp on privacy and more resources it would suffice. Give her time to think about the information she did manage to get anyways. She didn't care that her battery would probably die by the time she got home...or somewhere that wasn't this hospital anyways, she just went about putting it away and had just let the bag slide to the floor next to her bed when a knock came at the door. Looking over she saw Ari stepping in, with a few things to eat, a salad she knew that wasn't for her and a slice of chocolate cake she could only assume was for her. Despite herself at the moment, the way she was feeling, the corner of her lips twitched up slightly at his arid tone and the fact that he had picked out the most unhealthy item they probably had to sell. Aleece hid the endeared expression by ducking her head down as she sat up a little more properly and reached for the tray to pull it back to her. "Sounds good..." she said reaching out for it, of course she was going to eat it. She wasn't going to have sent him out to get food, and not, be it if she had just wanted privacy. "Thanks, by the way." She didn't mean just for the food, since it was kind of obvious at this point (she knew they both knew it). Aleece was aware that she needed to eat despite the fact her stomach rolling over at the sight of a usually tempting treat, and she wasn't going to let herself starve because of this. When Ari gave her the plastic container with the cake in it she leaned her forearms against the edge of the rolling tray and pushed her thumb into the front of it to flick the top of it open. It actually did somewhat appealing despite not being hungry, the glossy dark brown layer on top and a creamy whipped mouse in between two thick layers of cake made it look...good. But she could only wonder one thing..."Do you have a fork?" « Last Edit: Oct 22, 2009 20:50:54 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 22, 2009 20:39:37 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari was glad that he at least picked an item from the cafeteria that she would eat, even if it was just to appear polite. He had to swallow down a sigh, it was frustrating to have to cut off his first reaction but he had not yet been invited to voice his emotional state. The opening was left in the form of thanks, and he wanted to tell her the deep sense of anger he felt with himself. "You needn't thank me." He sat down slowly, the familiar tension returning to his chest as he leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. Letting his head drop forward his hair fell far enough over his brow to shade some of his face. The smell of the salad dressing spilling into his nostrils as he ripped the dressing package open. Swallowing thickly he closed his eyes and slowly shook his head. "I'm sorry, I left too quickly without giving you any warning. I should have been here, to stop it." He knew it wasn't fair to himself, or her, to say such a thing. It was necessary for him to have left in exactly the fashion he did. But it wasn't something he could have done properly, he had done his best not to lie to her for some time. But every time he left someone he cared about alone for a long period of time they had to deal with the consequences for his lack of foresight. A dangerous country, dangerous family, and now a dangerous school. He had been given a second chance to even find her alive, and he had been positive that he had lost her when his phone first rang. And it was a disturbing thought to confront. Holding out the spare fork Ari breathed through his nose, sure that the tightness of his throat would've sounded odd. The fork was placed on the tray and he let himself hide in the shadow as he batted down the swell of sorrowful memories and indignation with blow after blow, countering each tragedy and misfortune with heavy handed logic that was nearly as depressing as considering it his own fault. The swell had come to overwhelm him rapidly, and was pressed down steadily within the course of twenty seconds. An awkward silence, but much shorter then it could have otherwise been. "I will have an apartment ready by by tomorrow night. I can get a hotel room for a day if you don't want to stay here another night." « Last Edit: Oct 22, 2009 20:42:16 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 23, 2009 13:07:14 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Aleece was about to brush of that 'no need to thank me' as one of those things people say when they are trying to be modest, or...humble or something, and instead of saying anything she left her fingers curled around the bottom half of the plastic container - still finding this slice of cake fascinating as all hell. What he had to say next made her want to flinch a little but the only noticeable reaction the words got out of her was the subtle twitch of her fingers against the plastic. Don't say things like that. How in the world was she supposed to respond? She hadn't thought once that it was his fault, or anywhere closely associated with him in regards to what happened. Her tactic of just ignoring it for now wasn't quite working, and she could feel her face growing warm all over again at the effort to keep herself steady; to stop her fingers from trembling as she reached blindly for the fork he had laid down on the tray for her. She could feel her pulse pounding under her skin and working its way up into her ears when she closed her eyes to stave off the burning suddenly working up behind them. There was no other place the blame could be placed but with her at the moment. She hadn't even put up that much of a fight. Not quick enough, not strong enough...Aleece had grown a little to comfortable at the collective. She had been using others to watch her back for a little to long since getting here. Able to talk her way out of most situations or turn a situation into her favor with words, she had just not given thought to what would happen if she couldn't. There hadn't been a need to better herself physically...so no the blame couldn't be Ari's. She hadn't realized that she had only been holding the fork there over her cake as if she was about to take a bite, until he spoke up again. Talking about the apartment and getting a hotel. Taking a breath in as she pushed the fork down, Aleece opened her eyes to watch the tines sink into the treat. Well at least one of them had their wits about them. She certainly didn't want to stay here another night, and she desperately wanted a more comfortable bed after a hot hot bath. The fact was, Aleece wasn't quite as good as putting a damper on emotions it seemed, as Ari, because the dangerously threatening overwhelming feeling of self pity for all this was still welling up and hated the way it made her pitiable. Forcing the cake into her mouth, tasting like cardboard she tried to chew, the bite she realized instantly, was to big for her and she almost gagged. It was enough to break the depreciating thoughts in that moment and she grabbed at the milk he had brought with him to help wash it down. With her mouth and throat cleared after the long pull from the drink she let out a breath, tired of going around and around in her own head. "Its not...your fault." It was all she could think to say, the only thing she wanted to at this point on the subject looming over head like a bad storm. Aleece had been the one to step up on that day and catch his attention, get mixed up with it, and she had been the one to go running at night by herself (never mind the fact she thought she'd be okay on campus - how was she to know he was actually a student at the collective?) She had finally pissed off the right person, and apparently that person didn't have a lot of moral obligations, reminding her of a stray dog... Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 25, 2009 12:15:12 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari felt the oppressive emotions press against the shield he so forcefully constructed. Frowning slightly he stood and leaned over, resting a hand on her shoulder. He gave her a slight squeeze and attempted to use his perceived strength to guide her comfort back to the levels it had been before he showed his weakness "Why don't you get cleaned up and into the change of clothes. I picked some of the warmer clothes I could find. I'll call a hotel and reserve a room for us." Whatever stress that could have leaked into his expression moments earlier had been replaced with the show of fortitude that he could use to comfort her as much as such a simple thing could. Ari had cradled his food on the underside of his forearm, and shifted back toward the door. Presuming that she preferred the comfort of being unseen he went outside and closed the door tightly. He went to the nurses station and open the plastic container of his food. He ate two bites after he politely asked to borrow the phone. After a short conversation he reserved a hotel room, although it would only last an hour as he didn't care to leave a credit card floating in the ether of the airwaves. He also reserved it under an alias, hotels didn't care but they did a poor job of keeping your identity secret, and he was trained to be cautious, especially when he knew nothing about his enemy. Ari hanged up the phone and informed them that they would be leaving early, they looked skeptical but said that it would be fine as long as she signed out. He nodded and moved back to the room, noting that it had been undisturbed, and rested his shoulders against the outside door frame, eating while he waited for her to get ready to leave. Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 25, 2009 18:58:45 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Aleece hadn't tried to take another bite, but she didn't look up at Ari when he stood then and placed a hand on her shoulder. The weight was a little heavy and it seemed to make her drop her fork, but her fingers tightened around the cheap plastic just as his did on her slightly sagging shoulder. With her breath feeling a little shallow she didn't trust herself to speak - like anything on her mind that could be put into words would probably open a dam she wasn't willing to let flood out. She remembered once that her mother had become frustrated with her because there had been a time that she was being bullied at school, and had refused to talk about it. And it wasn't the first or last time something like that had happened. The woman had gone off in a tangent about not knowing where Aleece could have possibly gotten the stubborn, kind of detached personality trait from, but if there was one thing she hated was being made to talk about something. She knew that Ari hadn't made her, wouldn't make her, but all those time she had just gone about dealing with little things (or rather smaller then this) how she liked to, it was ultimately leading to not knowing how to talk about it now. She wasn't quick to tears on most things; Aleece could usually brush it off until there wasn't anyone around, or until it was just to much to handle in her own head, but she was getting dangerously close, in her opinion, to losing the grip she had. Ari's understanding on the whole situation the...fact he was helping her out (albeit in his own way) was making things painfully obvious for her. Like there was no hiding from the facts. But she would rather him be there quite honestly then not...she wasn't sure what she would do left to her own devices. Barely managing a nod at what he had to say she listened to him leave, not sure how long it would be before she would get to leave, knowing that the doctor on duty was going to prescribe her something, antibiotics and painkillers...not much else he could she supposed. Suddenly she was struck with the urge to do exactly what she was told to do. Get up and get dressed then get out of here. Honestly though she didn't look forward to taking the IV line from hand on her own, not a fan of pain to begin with she leaned back and reached up to hit the call button. Through the small speaker she heard the attending nurse, surely not Dolores, "can I help you?" It took Aleece a few seconds, clearing her throat lightly and nodding - one of those useless actions that people like when they were on the phone with someone, knowing that the person wouldn't be able to see it but doing it anyway. "Yeah...I need some help." It was all she felt like giving up at the moment and not sure how willing they would be to let her go, or how long it would take regardless after that. Aleece didn't' know that Ari was standing outside the door, so she didn't know if anyone had a hard time coming in but as she waited on the nurse to arrive she closed the top to the plastic container leaving the fork tucked along side. When the door did open a tall, thin and rather mousy looking man with dull brown hair showed himself, wearing dark blue scrubs. No bunnies, or cute cartoon hearts...nope not for this guy. Something...she surprisingly felt grateful for. When he glanced back at the door, sort of in a skittish way Aleece frowned in concern, the odd out of place gesture allowing her to break away from her own thoughts for the moment. However the moment was over before it began and he came to her bed as she sat up a little more pushing the tray out of the way. "You feeling okay?" She almost went to stop him as he went about to check her vitals but stopped when he noticed the bag of fluid empty, which had obviously been that way for some time, but she shook her head. "Actually I want to leave..." The male nurse paused and sent her a doubtful look knowing that the doctor would have to come in etc etc. They both knew it. There wasn't anything wrong with her except for the reason why she had been admitted. She wasn't running a fever, there was no infection - nothing that would cause immediate concern anyway. The man nodded shortly and went about chattering off a list of things that would be happening before she left...telling her that he would inform her doctor, so on as he removed the small rubber tube from the catheter, reassuring her it wouldn't take long. Before he left he, seeing that she was staring at the needle still left in her hand with the tape there it was made clear he would be back to take it out when the doctor came by. As perusal, Aleece had kept silent nodding to let him know he understood and waited until he left again before rolling her shoulders to expel the tension knotted up. Looking to the chair where her bag was next to, to the bathroom door she was tempted to grab a shower, but she knew Ari was getting that hotel... Privacy, and possibly a tub to soak in. She could wait. -- Some thirty minutes later and in her own clothes, a pair of faded jeans that sat precariously on her hips and a loose hooded sweater, Aleece felt somewhat normal again. She sank stiffly into the chair that was beside her bed her shoes and a pair of socks dangling from her fingers, finding that moving around wasn't working anything out. Pushing up the sleeves of the sweater she let out a sigh, something that came off as a muted groan instead. By this point the sky was starting to lighten as dawn crept up, but it was still early, ridiculously so. Blinking heavily and with a grunt she made herself slip on her socks then her shoes which she left unlaced for the time being before sinking back in the chair, boneless. No sooner had she relaxed then it seemed the door opened again and in walked a man, looking tired and wearing a white coat, holding a metal clipboard...obviously the doctor. Followed by the nurse from earlier. He seemed to waste no time coming up to her pulling a stool from near by and rolling right up next to her as he reached out to gesture her to sit up. His fingers were cold she noted as he routinely went about asking her questions all of which she answered to in her favor to expedite her checking out. "How are you feeling?" There was a moment when she thought she was going to answer sarcastically but she muttered fine. "Pain on a scale from one to ten?" A lie was automatically on the tip of her tongue, despite every ache she was feeling, "about a two..." There was a skeptical look on his face and he hummed as he checked the papers resting on his leg, reaching up as he did to remove a small pin light. He checked her vitals much like the nurse had...all of this was tedious at best and repetitive as the male nurse removed the needle still in her hand. Finally he leaned back away from her, straightening as he pulled the prescription paper attached to everything on the clipboard, holding it out to her. "I've prescribed a round of Amoxicillian for you which you will take three times a day until gone. Also fifty milligrams of Ultram, take them by mouth every six hours or as needed." After he stopped talking she noticed that he hadn't gotten up to leave like she thought he would, letting her go. Instead she almost grimaced at the sympathetic, understanding look on his face. "Also..." he said drawing out a card from his breast pocket a name and number printed on the front. "This is the name of someone you can talk to, that will understand and he-" She cut him off by standing with everything still in her hands loosely, "thank you, doctor." He seemed to get it. Thank God. Because he nodded from somewhere behind her as she faced the window and she heard the door close once more as they left. Shaking her head and closing her eyes her fingers bunched the slip in her fingers. It was only when she heard the tap at the door that she turned to find Ari waiting, and both the doctor and nurse gone. "I guess we can go...?" « Last Edit: Oct 26, 2009 8:35:44 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 26, 2009 9:07:50 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari was determined to stay right where he was, and he was exasperating both the nurse and doctor. They invited him to follow them into the room or to go back to the waiting room. He stared them down each time they insisted that he followed the hospital rules to do one or the other. When they pressed him, before entering the room the second time, he reminded them that he was the one that would be responsible for Aleece's safety for the coming months, and he wouldn't let them stop him from waiting nearby while still allowing her privacy. The last time they left the pair sighed and the elder of the two jerked his thumb over his shoulder, and muttered that she was ready to leave whenever. Ari turned and lobbed the last of his food and container into the trash, and stepped into the doorway. He tapped his knuckles against the door, his other hand stuffed into his pocket. "I have a room reserved, but not for long, so we should get going before reservations fill up." Ari stepped into the room and went straight to her bag. He carefully stashed away her laptop and cables, and hefted the heavy bag over his shoulder. After motioning her to step out of the room he turned and held onto the door handle, waiting to see if she would need a steadying hand to help her walk out of the hospital. The reason they needed to go quickly was because the reservation was only for one hour. They expected some kind of business meeting to take place soon, and that would lead to the hotel filling up rather quickly if it was the company that the receptionist accidentally leaked. The loose tongue was the reason he gave a fake name and intended to pay in cash. Security in America had tightened over the past eight years, but not everyone got the hint quite yet. Shaking off the criticism he stepped into the hall and stood beside Aleece for a second, gauging the pace she would be comfortable with, and started toward the elevator in silence. The hospital was still quiet, the only noise coming from the ambulance dock as people busied themselves to be ready for an incoming patient. Taking the elevator, stepping out the front door, the sun began to color the clouds, but only dimly. Ari guided her to the curb where he waved down a taxi with a sharp whistle. He opened the door for her after it pulled up to the curb and let Aleece pile in, and then shifted into the seat behind her. After the door closed he gave the location he needed the cab to go to, and they pulled out as the morning traffic thinned. That was the only problem they would have, the commuter traffic. It would probably take a full two hours to even arrive at the hotel. So he placed the bag on the floor over his feet and glanced to the side. "This could take a while, you may want to rest." Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 28, 2009 18:44:53 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Once in the room, Ari seemed to not waste a bit of time, going to her things and grabbing them up even as she had headed in the same direction. With a quiet sigh to herself she let him handle it and strayed away from that particular debate, even if she was sore and in all honesty hurting at the moment she had the urge to insist she could carry something. However he seemed to express the need to hurry as the reservations weren't for that long, and instead followed him right out of the hospital room, aware that her shoes were untied but unwilling to bend over to take the time do so. Despite not being particularly jittery or scared around a crowd she stuck close to Ari, just behind him and slightly off to the side noting that he was compromising his usual brisk pace to match her own. But that was fine, Aleece didn’t think she could go much faster then she was. Following him, first, through the hospital room door, then down the hall to the elevator and finally out of the building entirely there was only a moment’s wait while a taxi was hailed. There was no room to complain while Ari handled everything, letting her shuffle into the cab first before he followed shortly. Her eyes had already started to fall shut even as he suggested she get comfortable. The interior smelled like stale tobacco masked over with a worn down vanilla care freshener, which she had seen hanging from the rear view mirror when she got in, in the novelty shape of pine tree. Sinking deeper into the vinyl covering of the seat vaguely asked, ‘where to,’ and she didn’t answer even though she was sure the driver was stealing looks at the both of them. Her face already felt like minced meat and she turned her face, facing the closed the window to get it out of the sight of curious man. Feeling the seat next to her dip when Ari settled in, she allowed herself to not only relax back into the worn backseat but him as well. Aleece wasn’t sure where this hotel was at so she waited for Ari to divulge that bit of information, quickly tuning any conversation out as she made herself comfortable to get through the morning traffic. It was something, she was sure that she had gotten more then a full nights sleep with the help of those meds they had given her in the hospital but she was struck with a sense of being incredibly groggy all of a sudden, now that she was out of there, and could really relax without to much prodding and poking. Taking Ari’s word that this trip could take sometime she felt herself nodding off as the hum and whine of the tires cut across pavement underneath them, the subtle vibrations of the motor running all seemed to help her nod off. But Aleece didn’t fight against it, hoping that if she napped, it would make the trip shorter then it really was… « Last Edit: Oct 28, 2009 19:28:00 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 28, 2009 20:29:33 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari noticed that Aleece was just as tired as she looked, as once they were inside and on their way she slumped toward him, resting against him while she dozed. It wasn't hard to guess why, he knew exactly why. It caused a small surge of anger, which he directed at his cab driver when he mentioned he tried to make a lewd comment. Something about keeping his woman in line, not something he wanted to commit to memory, and he only kept from beating him half to death because there was more important things happening. It took just as long as one would expect in the heavy traffic, and once arrived he had the distasteful task of actually paying the man, which was something he very much did not want to do. With a gentle nudge he helped Aleece sit upright as he slipped out of the cab, pulling her luggage off the ground, and slung it over his shoulder as he exited the cab. Holding the door open for her to get out, keeping a sharp eye on the cabbie. He rounded the cab and crouched down, smiling faintly to keep on a show of normalcy while he spoke in an icy cold voice. "You are lucky that I have more important things to do then show you how easy it would be to show you the most excruciating pain of your life." He slid the money for the ride out of his pocket and tossed it into the window carelessly. "Thanks for the ride." The hotel, on the outside, didn't look all that special. But on the inside it was impressive enough. Or so he was told. And so he was sure it would hold up to what he needed, as he had a good idea of just what to expect. The process of getting into the hotel was simple, walk through the front, give his name, pay for one night, and walked off with the two key cards. Ari opened the door to the room, shifting his gaze over his shoulder out of habit. He would've kept the name he used for the reservations, and the source of his money, rather quiet for the moment. For one, it required a private space, and for another it was something that would draw only more questions. And so once inside alone he would accept any questions she decided to pose to him. Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 28, 2009 21:37:07 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Aleece was completely unwilling to wake up, just like the first time in the hospital bed, she was hit was discomforts all around: a faint dizziness from the short and sudden arousal from unconsciousness, a slight stiffness resounding in her neck and shoulders from her awkward position, and her throat once again dry. But she followed Ari out of the taxi without thinking really, not paying the cabbie a bit of attention, dutifully just going along. It took little time to get checked in as she leaned lightly against the check in counter next to him, noting, but not saying anything, when he used a fake name and withdrew cash to pay for the room. It pricked at her curiosity, naturally, but she kept her mouth shut all the same until they were in the room. The air was dry, cold, and held that distinct "hotel room" smell. All in all it wasn't bad and she made her way in only to come to a pause in the middle of the room. Turning she looked at Ari for a moment and took a couple steps toward him. Aleece might have been inclined to ask a few questions over his seemingly to cautious behavior but first things first...she wanted clean. Holding out her hand to him, the gesture clearly asked silently for her bag. "I'm going to grab a shower and bath real quick..." It had been the one constant thing on her mind and she couldn't seem to get rid of the way her skin crawled at the moment, knowing it was all in her head...or from how cool the hotel room was. Either way, that was her first priority. Questions and talking would surely and undoubtedly come later, because she knew that no matter how patient he was being, Ari would more then likely want answers before to long. And the same thing could be said for her. She would like to know what had happened to him, why he had suddenly gone missing and out of no where it seemed reappeared. It almost felt to late to be thinking about that now, but when things settled down it would give her time to possibly sort out questions and get a few answers, what he was willing to answer at least. When Ari handed over her things she totted it to the bathroom, small but clean and was a little disappointed to see that there was only a stand up shower provided. However that didn't mean a whole lot and certainly wouldn't stop her from peeling herself out of her clothes; first tugging the shirt over her head and pausing to glance at her reflection. Turning to the side and looking over her shoulder she caught a look at the slight road rash she had gotten, knowing it had been there but touching it gingerly anyway. Slipping her pants down she once again took in the bruises that only slight discolored her already naturally tanned skin at her hips and thighs. Feeling a sudden bitter, acrid and sharp taste floating up her throat she turned away and finished getting out of her clothes pushing them away with her foot, before heading into the shower stall. The hot water was turned on first, full blast before she slowly turned the cold water knob, and even then it wasn't nearly enough to be considered tolerable. Aleece gritted her teeth and bared with it though, slipping under the stinging pelts of water from the stainless steal shower head and closed her eyes as she forced herself to adjust to the temperature. It didn't take any time at all for her skin to start reddening under the heat, and with her back to the stream she titled to the side to lean against the cool tile, still allowing half of her body to be in contact with the water. Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 28, 2009 21:59:43 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari closed the door and walked into the room, having handed off the bag and watched her slip into the bathroom. He was worried about her, but they both had many questions that would need to be answered, and the first ones weren't 'are you okay' as it was a pathetic question. He chose this hotel because from what little time he had spent in the state he had heard this one had more then just a bathroom and bed. In the room was a couch that he would be able to sleep on, presuming that not only would Aleece want her own bed, but she probably didn't want him in the same room. A wall separated the view of the bed from the couch, which was a depressing plus for the room. Ari looked to the couch and sat down on the middle of the couch, swinging his legs up and dropping his head down onto the rough pillow that was stiff and uncomfortable. Hell, it was heaven compared to some of the places he had slept. And so he was perfectly fine on the couch, and after being up all night he wanted to rest his muscles some, expecting that Aleece would take some time. And so he rested, his eyes open, starting intently at the wall as he used his imagination to run through any number of things he could do to the man who so deeply hurt Aleece. Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 28, 2009 22:40:05 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Aleece had slide down the tile wall, all of a sudden to tired and feeling completely drained at the moment to stand anymore. She shifted herself to be right under the wider spray of the water and drew her legs in, wrapping her arms around them to hug them closely as she bowed her head atop her knees. Her right foot folded on top of her left slightly, her toes curling as her shoulders hunched forward, essentially making her look like a tightly curled ball before she relaxed. She wasn't exactly sure what would happen after the water would start to turn cold and she would pull herself out of the shower, but for now she breathed in the heavy steam accumulating, the sound of the beating droplets all her hears could pick up. The heat was enough to make her shoulders relax, and every muscles that had been knotted uncomfortably smooth out, the rhythmic gentle pounding against her skin like a mini massage. She was sure she could have fall asleep if she hadn't been sitting up with no support to lean on, besides that she was torn between getting up to grab one of those small complimentary bars of soap from the tray on the sink counter and staying put. She didn't particularly want to leave the warmth of the shower to freeze in the hotel room...so she made her mind up quickly: Stay. And stay she did, until the hot water ran out, and started to go somewhat tepid and she took that as her signal to get out. Her skin was still a rosy hue, her finger tips wrinkly, and she had become somewhat numb from not moving for at least thirty minutes, but that was fine...even without washing her hair or skin she felt at least a million times better then she did. Aleece shut the water off and stepped out, a shiver running all the way up from the bottom of her feet to the tip of her head, it felt like, as soon as she came in contact with the cool floor and air. Snagging a waiting towel she quickly wrapped up and headed for her bag, fishing around to see that, embarrassingly enough Ari had even grabbed fresh underwear and a bra. The heat that flushed over her at the sight was enough to stave off any chill...Holding the pair up, she noted it matched, and they just happen to be one of her favorite sets, the light blue boy cut shorts and matching light blue bra. Well, it seemed their tastes ran similar. Stashing that stray thought Aleece got dressed quickly, pulling on the clean shirt she found and a pair of sleep shorts as well. When Aleece was finished, she grabbed a fresh dry towel and moved it to her hair to slowly work the wet strands dry as she made her way out, and into the were the sitting area part of the hotel was at. Instantly she spotted Ari and she joined him silently, choosing the chaise lounge opposite next to the sliding bay patio doors. She would wait for him first...not because she was unwilling, but she really didn't know what to say. Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 28, 2009 23:13:00 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari had stretched out rather tiredly, his limbs curled just slightly, his hand under the pillow that his head rested on, with the other resting off the edge of the couch. If he was in his own apartment he would have a handgun under his head, and his feet would be pressed against the back of the couch to give him maximum mobility. But even when not in his own residence he couldn't shake the way of sleeping when something was to his back. When the shower stopped his eyes closed and he sighed. The image of her battered nude body brought only shame and pain upon him, even the tinges of his bodies reaction to the thought could not press through the cloud of heavy guilt. He could only fight imagining what had happened to her while he was gone, and he cursed the reasoning behind his absence bitterly. The door opened and a freshly cleaned, warm skinned, Aleece slipped out of the bathroom. She came out in a clean shirt and shorts he had plucked out of the assortment of clothes she had stashed away. Ari stooped himself from glancing at her bruises and instead focused on her eyes as he pressed hummed his acknowledged her cleaned form returning to the room. Men had fantasied about less romantic scenarios, a beautiful young woman striding out of a shower into a private hotel room with no one around to interrupt them. The only problem with that image being what happened before, and what he represented was little more then a guard dog, and he was well aware of both facts. "I assumed you would be more comfortable if I took the couch." Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 29, 2009 8:59:07 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Aleece had settled on the couch opposite him silently, content to keep it that way and taking up a similar position that Ari was in - on her side with her head resting on the stiff decorative pillow provided. She let the towel drape over the side to the floor as she slid her hands down and between her knees as she curled them up slightly. With a faint motion she shook her head. "I've been in a bed all night..." She left the statement to hang there for him to no doubt deny taking as an offer to get some real rest. "Besides, its not even noon." Aleece disliked the idea of laying around asleep all day even if she wasn't making an effort to get up now. She was comfortable, in clean clothes, and clean herself. Now that she was able to look at him properly, she saw he was pretty exhausted. She had the sudden urge to join him, but she couldn't even make the muscles in her legs twitch, and she certainly kept her mouth shut to ask him to come to her. Pressing her lips together and curling her legs up more, like a physical effort to not do anything more she closed her eyes and sighed. Despite all that she was feeling drained and it made her break first with curiosity, "so? Where have been?" That was a pretty broad question as she didn't know what he had been doing for quite some time now. It seemed there wasn't a whole lot she knew about the guys she had gotten involved with, even though Ari had divulged some of his past to her at one point or another...there was plenty still unclear. She couldn't help but wonder if him leaving so suddenly was because of it...? Aleece cracked her eyes, finding the carpet an all to interesting shade, and wondered why it agitated her sensibilities before she peeled her eyes away to look at him again. « Last Edit: Oct 29, 2009 10:31:24 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 29, 2009 9:43:07 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari understood that she had been in bed all night, he had been there most of it watching over her. He made a lot of people uncomfortable, including himself. His muscles were sore, his eyes dry and tired, wanting to close so he could wet them slightly. But he refused to take his eyes off her, even as she matched his stance on the couch across from him. But he broke eye contact for a moment when she mentioned it wasn't even noon. He nodded and thought that he hadn't meant that she should go to bed immediately, but that he would be staying to help her feel protected. But then again she was a little more literal then him at times, it had happened before. He looked up as he felt her eyes on him, a faint warmth forming from her appraisial. It was the longest she had looked at him since he joined her in the hospital, she had avoided him for some time, but now she was looking at him. The way she pursed her lips and curled her legs up reminded him of an image of a child, tired and frightened, but too hurt to ask for the comfort of another as it curled up on itself protectively. Ari frowned and slowly swung his legs around, sitting up, and rested his forearms on his knees as he glanced across the expanse that seemed to yawn on forever at the moment. The distance set between them had been consistent, the most he had touched her was a small squeeze on the shoulder, and he had the urge to embrace her and whisper that he would protect her. But instead he was met with the need to explain himself. "The incident that occurred when I first came to Knox, it was farther reaching then you realized." He sat back and craned his neck to one side, his eyes unfocused for a moment as he centered his mind on the time he was gone. It felt like he was almost a different person compared to how he felt now. "It was logged into the NSA database and they 'requested my presence' for a vetting process." At this point he was dancing a tight rope. If he told her too much it could mean trouble, and if he told her too little he would feel as though he was lying. The process had been slow, intergovernmental communication had to go through certain channels and authentication periods, and they had the right to hold him for so many hours while it all happened. He never requested a lawyer or said more then necessary, but he knew what they thought of him. He was an anomaly, someone they too could use. But they weren't sure if they could trust him, and it would take years of their training to even let him into a military uniform, let alone trust him with national security matters. Not that he would blame them, that was what his own countrymen had done to him after all. The agencies communication was slow, but it lead to him being released with several quizzical looks. Only the upper echelon knew why he was there, and it was stamped classified for international and intergovernmental reasons. Ari shook the bureaucracy out of his head and turned back. "It took a lot of time confirming what little family I have left, confirming the dead, and assessing if I was a threat." It took several days in fact, but he was leaving out the fact that he got off it because a sealed envelope from Israel had landed on the directors desk apologizing for brash action. It caused a strain, and they questioned him fully in an attempt to discover if there was an instruction to assault the school. He of course said it was of his own initiative as a way to challenge their training methods and security. "I was isolated, I had no way to contact you." Which was true, but he had to leave out the punishment he received. Other then being brow beat by the American's he was also sent on a small assignment from his own country, something that was required of him that lead him to fall into a small amount of cash, and a news clipping of a mysterious explosion on the border of Arizona and Mexico, a meth lab belonging to the cartel that had connections with their enemies. In and out, and the money that would burn in his pockets, which he would use for her sake. But how could he clean that up for her consumption? Ari shook his head and bowed his head, shifting up to his feet. He stepped around the dividing wall and went to the bed, pulling a much more comfortable pillow out from under the sheets, and went to the couch Aleece was laying on. He placed it behind her head in case she wished to switch, and rested his hand lightly on her cheek for a moment. "I'm sorry, I wasn't left with many options." He stroked her cheek gently, wanting to lay down with her and hold her, the desire to comfort her shown in an uncharacteristically nervous smile, not having the confidence that it was the right thing to do. « Last Edit: Oct 29, 2009 9:44:46 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 29, 2009 10:27:38 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top The NSA.... It took her brain a minute to scrabble for what the acronym stood for: The National Security Agency. The United States cryptology organization that coordinated and directed highly specialized activities to protect United States information systems and to produce foreign intelligence information. It just brought on a whole different pot of questions for her in that instant but she stayed silent as he slowly continued. He was being cautious of how he answered, careful, like he was trying to tell her enough to sate her inquisitiveness on the subject, but not to the point of it being the whole truth. Well...she understood...really she did, and even if it pricked at her to ask more, she didn't. It was obvious that even if he was willing to answer her questions there was still a whole lot he couldn't say. If there was no way he could contact her during that time, then there was no way she could exactly hold it against him. She showed her willingness to except what he had said as good enough by just staying quiet, watching as he stood and walked to the bedroom, disappearing out of sight for a moment. Aleece took the time to re-close her eyes and let out a sigh as she relaxed against the couch completely unaware that Ari had come back in almost an instant later until she felt something next to her head. Opening her eyes again heavily she saw him leaning over her and she shifted to her back, then reached for the pillow to exchange it for the one she had been using. What she hadn't been expecting was the hand on her cheek and more over, the tentative smile. She was almost to shocked to do anything, because Ari had only shown her a few sides to his personality - a constant puzzle she had the urge to pick apart. Yeah that had been what had kept her interested after that first meeting, and it seemed every time she thought she had a good idea what he was about...he showed something different, changing it all up again. Aleece almost didn't catch his apology, but she was at the point where she wasn't going to hold anything against him. He was here now, and that - to her- was all that really mattered. She didn't know what he had been through but if he couldn't talk about it, it was fine, for now she could accept it. It was the foreign look on his face that made her lift a hand to chest, her fingers curling into the material and tugging lightly, giving him all the invitation or urging he would need to sit or lay down with her. "Its okay," she said quietly, reiterating her earlier words that morning. She didn't realize at the time how ironic the words sounded coming out of her mouth, her reassuring him. It felt kind of backwards, but the words seemed to be needed.. « Last Edit: Oct 29, 2009 10:29:55 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 29, 2009 10:49:02 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top His smile changed slowly as he felt her fingers curling into the material of his thin t-shirt, which was tucked under a heavy autumn jacket that rested loosely on his shoulders. Ari looked more confident again as he was invited by the gentle tugging. Without pause he leaned his chest down onto the front of the couch, the only place open to him at the moment, and pulled his legs up to rest on the end of the couch. She curled herself up from his knees to around his chin, from before he was invited to lay way her, and once there he had little room left on the couch and so he was balanced precariously on the edge as he brushed his thumb over her cheek gently, not having moved his hand. For a few long moments he just watched her, his balance making him slightly tense in the lower half of his body as his legs were shifted in such a way to expand his center of balance, but his hand was gentle on her cheek as he watched her quietly. He became aware in that moment that not only could he see the pain inflicted on her, just from how her expression changed, but she would also see the faint sadness and worry that was slipping through the cracks of his tired face. Not one to waste time he cleared his throat quietly and rested his hand lightly on her neck, ready to slip his hand back to his chest, but truely wanting to slip it over her shoulders and pull her to him. "What kind of apartment would you like to look for?" He asked, his eyelids drooping slightly as he rested his head on the edge of the pillow, not noting that in his tiredness his body was acting without his active consent as the hand on the side of her neck slipped up to her shoulder and rubbed warmth into her shoulders gently. Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 29, 2009 12:08:44 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top She saw that he was doing a good enough job to balance himself there on the edge when he finally settled down, and she noted that he was starting to get drowsy without really wanting to. But having him there, Aleece felt the last bit of the tension plaguing her shoulders draining away as well when she felt his thumb skim over her cheek. He must have been wiped out because she could pin point the look of stress on his face, and something else...but she didn't want to think it of it as pity. When his hand slid down to her neck she shifted her head a little and straightened out her legs, giving him more room, hating that she was cause for his state at the moment. Here he had been gone doing God only knew what and now he was taking care of her, because she couldn't do it herself apparently. She didn't answer his question seeing that he was starting to drop off and didn't think about it as she moved her hand down from where it had been still bunched in his his shirt, over his side and around his waist under the jacket he wore. Pulling herself closer she situated herself so her head fit right under his chin, burying her face into his chest. It was familiar, the smell and the feel, making her arm tighten around him and feeling her throat close off unexpectedly. And she stayed like that refusing to move her face up, or let go when she felt her face getting hot all over again the, by now, recognizable swell of emotions that made her breathing go a little shallow with difficulty. Aleece knew she wouldn't be able to hide it at all this time, not with the way she was practically clinging on to him, and the faint tremble he undoubtedly felt because of it. He was making it a little to easy for her to be like this, it was nothing he had said or done to bring it on or set the reaction off, but again it was the fact he was there, that he knew...despite anything he had going on he was putting her first. It brought a slew of self declining thoughts that caused her breath to hitch painfully. In that instant she went from relaxing to a tensed mess all over again, vaguely aware that her face was wet, unmistakable as anything else other then having started to cry. Aleece was good to be quiet about it though, other then muffled sounds of her sniffing and catching breaths, nothing else broke the other wise still air in the hotel room, aside from the running A/C. The pressure, and strain of the pounding feelings quickly brought a tension headache centered in her temples, and along the back of her neck realizing...she hadn't done this yet. Aleece knew though it was a little unfair to break down on him like she was, without telling him anything in the first place, but she couldn't...wouldn't. « Last Edit: Oct 29, 2009 19:51:29 GMT -6 by aleeca » Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 29, 2009 12:35:17 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari didn't notice how close his eyelids came to closing until movement caught his attention. The familiar scent and the lack of noise coming from the door told him that he drifted off a moment, and while doing so he was being tugged toward Aleece a little more once again. Her legs had straightened out, no longer pressing toward him, but instead parallel with him. The hand bunched up in his shirt slid over his side at some point, and it stirred him as he was being pulled toward her as she pulled herself closer to him. Shifting in compliance he found himself resting on the middle of the couch, comfortable with his balance, and relaxed as Aleece tucked her head under his chin. Her hair was slightly damp, smelling faintly of the tasteful sample shampoo from the hotel shower, and the warmth of her body made the weariness of his eyes heavier. By now he knew that she was breaking down, the walls she had up around her were nothing close to those he had been forced to possess. He had faced emotional and physical pain different then hers, but he knew all too well that her's was likely worse, and the shock that had kept her shields strong also made them brittle. Once he was shown she was comfortable with him near her brittle shields strained, and now they had broken. Ari could feel a warm dampness on his collar bone as Aleece trembled faintly. Over the air conditioning he could vaguely catch her sniffles and her breath catching in her throat as she cried. Cold water or a knife slash couldn't have roused him to full consciousness faster then the primal surge of emotional that welled in his eyes. instinctively the hand on her shoulder slipped over her back, pressing into the middle of her back to hold her carefully against him, as though she may break if he squeezed too hard. "It's alright," He spoke in a quiet but strong voice, knowing it wasn't, but hoping he could make it so. It would take time to put the pieces together, but he would make a fortress for her to heal in, and do all he could to help her. Starting with quiet but strong words of reassurance as he rubbed his hand over her back. Ari kissed the top of her head softly, and then rested his chin on the top of her head, his eyes blinking several times to brush off the urge to cry silently with her. Back to Top   aleeca Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 30, 2009 21:27:39 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Its alright...Aleece was sure it would be but it certainly didn't feel like it right now. As she tried to put a damper on her sniveling she didn't bother pulling back, aware that he was tightening his hold on her she relaxed hers. She hadn't meant to disturb him, but she hadn't been able to keep it together, not really. And God did she feel pathetic, unable to do anything else at the moment then what she was already doing because the more she tried to get a hold of herself, the harder it seemed to be to actually do it. They weren’t body-wracking sobs, they didn't jolt her but they certainly felt crippling locking her in the state she was in for a little bit longer. Eventually though the quiet hitching in her breath gave way to hiccups that soon settled down leaving her feeling physically exhausted. Ari was a soothing constant in all this, taking it and not pushing being almost to much what she needed, wanted. But there was no way she could turn down what he offered, in the sense that he was. Aleece realized she wasn’t strong enough; she had been a very sheltered individual for all of her life, living an average life with an average family even having mediocre disputes with them. There hadn’t been anything she had wanted for and never really been dealt any upsetting or jarring hand that shook her world quite like this. In fact, she had always lamented the fact that her life was to boring. Nothing exciting or out of the ordinary quite happened to Aleece Fontecilla, a middle child of a working class family. Maybe she had always been a tad to curious, always stuck her nose where it didn’t belong to try and find something that interested her, but she wasn’t outstandingly brave (in fact she had a few hang ups – like watching scary movies with no lights on), she wasn’t exceedingly pretty, and she sometimes questioned everything to often. Aleece was insatiable at times, over confident in her smarts and perhaps a little cocky because of them. She was often times a good two shoes – with no drinking, smoking, cursing or parties, and realized that because of it, it left her ostracized from kids her own age. She’d never felt the weight of peer pressure so she’d never given in to it. …And despite all that – what she knew about herself, the good and not so good, she had liked who she was, what made her, her - unassuming, small, easy to miss in the back of a crowd, Aleece. What she couldn’t figure out now, of all the problems she had ever solved, why would anyone want to bother with the likes of her? Why go out of your way to make someone that didn’t stick out a completely different person. Because she knew…that after this, after what ever stages of dealing with trauma she had to go through to get over this, she would be different. By then, Aleece had fallen completely silent, her arm draped loosely, limply over Ari’s side, her face still damp and buried against him having not moved an inch, and with no inclination to do so for a while. She felt over heated and her head pounded fiercely. Every pump of her heart that carried blood through her veins was felt right under her skin, making that tension headache felt all the more pronounced. With eyes irritated and sore, no doubt puffy from the short stint of crying were probably red even if she had them closed. She couldn’t verbally ask anything from Ari…already feeling like he was giving up to much for her sake or…giving her more then she deserved at the moment, but she was grateful for it and felt bad that she couldn’t even tell him that much. However, she was tired and Aleece let her body do what it wanted to at this point: drained, sore and hurting she fell asleep on him like she was. Without a word and feeling an utter wreck, she, like the mixed matched emotions rolling around in her head, was out like a light switch had been flipped, nearly – still feeling like she should try and stay awake but knowing he wasn’t going anywhere… Back to Top   keith Guest [send pm] Joined: January 1970 Posts: 0 ``Theres Only Yourself To Blame`` « Oct 31, 2009 11:18:22 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Ari was awake for the whole while Aleece wept into his chest. His own breath was heavy a with emotion, nothing compared to the cycle of tears that she went through, his hands brushing over her quivering muscles in a comforting effort. The dampness on his chest started to chill his skin, her gentle breaths starting to chill it quickly as she cried herself out of energy, and without moving her body loosened. Soon her body was still, resting limply against him while he held her carefully to him. She had made no effort to remove herself, instead stayed inside his embrace for the comfort she required, sleeping out of physical and emotional exhaustion. The poor young woman was completely exhausted, it showed by how quickly she fell asleep. It took him some time longer as he entertained thoughts of violence, listing punishments from various laws and gods. Allah wished the rapist lashed one hundred times with a whip. American laws required several pathetic years in too cushy prisons, only to be released back into society. His father had once dealt with a rapist with a single bullet, but it was a disgustingly simple and painless death. Through the combination of laws he was sure he could enact proper vengeance, even if others claimed that vengeance was the Lords. A chill weighed on his chest as he realized that he had never entertained such thoughts before. He was told several times over to do nothing more then what he was instructed for his missions, no more then required. It was a dangerous thing to go beyond, as it was already an atmosphere that increased risk and the erosion of the soul, of that nagging voice that was only quiet because what was being done was for the greater good. What greater good would be served by torturing a single evil soul for his own satisfaction? It would lead to little more then degrading his own soul by falling to that level without actual necessity. But if it was asked of him he would do it without question, only he suspected she would never ask him to attain such vengeance. As his thoughts dwindled he succumbed to his own exhaustion, his arms not loosing their protective hold as he fell asleep on the couch with Aleece. Back to Top   Reply Share Thread Facebook Twitter Tumblr LinkedIn MySpace Email Go to Previous Thread Next Thread Please make a selection first