« Prev 1 2 3 4 Next » Reply Share Thread Facebook Twitter Tumblr LinkedIn MySpace Email Go to Previous Thread Next Thread Please make a selection first Author Topic: Checkup (Leif) (Read 1,197 times) Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 13:44:06 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Oh. I'm sorry..." His own voice softened, tried to be comforting, tried to hide the frustration with himself that he obviously just made things worse. Why was he even here? All he did was hurt people. What was the point of him even talking to anyone when there was someone here who could just think about it - and didn't even have to know what "it" was - and instantly pull out the way to fix everything? "I was just trying to say, you seem really strong, and I respect that." « Last Edit: Mar 14, 2016 16:12:52 GMT -6 by Aaron Silverman » Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 16:34:54 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Thank you." Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 16:54:19 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "No worries, just being honest." He used to be able to just... shrug everything off. What happened to the Aaron who, when told not to get involved with Clavish because he could get hurt, said if he were worried about his own safety he never would've taken this job? What happened to the Aaron who thought his powers could still do good in the world? What happened to the Aaron who could take a hint. Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 18:01:29 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Leif continued to lie there for a moment, not sure of what to say. Looking in the mirror was often the most difficult thing to do, and nobody saw their own strength when they looked back at themselves. They only saw it in others. "I know how it feels, man," she murmured softly. "I get where you're coming from. But you need to be strong... for yourself. I'm not telling you this hoping to hurt you, I'm saying it for your own good." She sighed. "You have messed yourself all kinds of up. And if you go to war like this, you'll not do anybody any good. You need to do whatever it takes to snap out of this before you get yourself and your loved ones killed." Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 19:40:53 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Don't worry, I didn't think you were trying to hurt me." He'd already been hurt badly enough that if she did try, he wouldn't notice. Even if she literally stuck one of her electric scalpels in his throat - you can't break something that's already broken. He'd put on a brave face for a couple people, and he used to think he was strong, but past that, when he looked, he was just... empty, right now. Hollow. Worthless. What strength was there to be had? What could he really offer anyone? What was darkness next to control over the multiverse itself and the ability to instantly pluck out the answer to every issue? What was he that made it worth him not just going off into the desert and never being seen again? If he had that power he could answer his own question, ironically enough. "I'm trying. I already knew I had to work on myself before I worked things out with everyone else, all I want with them is the door open. A chance to prove myself. I really wish I could just wave my hand and have none of this bother me at all, that I could just literally pull the answers I need out of thin air like some people here. It's just not that simple, the best I've been able to manage is trying to focus on other things. Me, Sarah, everyone I know, what's saying any of us are coming back? All I know is I want to do everything in my power to protect everyone I can, especially the people I care most about." Though it wasn't very heroic to have people you want to protect more than others, was it? 'Every life is worth saving, but some lives are more worth saving than others'? "I really am trying. I used to be so much stronger than this - not even that long ago." Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 19:44:28 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top She heaved a heavy sigh. "Nothing I have said has gotten through to you," she muttered, finally looking away from him. She kept her arm over her face, blocking most of it from view. Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 19:46:54 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "It has. I'm digesting it, thinking about what I have to do. You're right, I'm just thinking over how I can do it." Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 19:52:04 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "No, it hasn't. If it had, you wouldn't need to think. You'd know." She took a deep breath, rolling onto her side so she could prop herself up on one arm and look him in the eye. "Stop trying to be a hero. Stop thinking you're this big bad ass. Stop trying to be super strong for everybody. You're... what? Sixteen? Seventeen? You're a kid. You've got a lot of growing up to do. We all do. And you're going to go out there, and you're going to kill yourself and your entire team. Because you've set up this bullshit bar and you're not going to reach it. You DON'T want to die. Obviously. Otherwise, you wouldn't have stopped me from killing you. SO STOP. Just fakkin' relax, man... Sheez." She fell back onto her back, throwing her arm over her eyes again. "You're not a hero. You'll never be this idea of a hero you have. So stop worrying about it and just... be." Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 20:20:25 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Seventeen, yeah. Yesterday was my birthday." With everyone he wanted to celebrate with off fighting, or abandoning him... yay. She had a point, though. If he really wanted to die, he would've just let her stab him. Unless that had been some instinctive thing. He fell silent for the rest, considering it, thinking over her words. They were too important to just fire something off without consideration. He'll never be a hero, huh? And Eric gets to be? She was telling him to reject a fundamental part of what he was. What was he without the ability to protect people? To help people and, yes, stop those who do evil? Nothing. No one. A waste of his parents' genes. It wouldn't be so bad if he didn't come home, maybe. Who would care? Who would miss him? He wouldn't be a loss to the world. But he wasn't going to let people die on his watch. "Thanks, Leif. I mean it." Because if nothing else, whatever ended up happening, she tried. She thought he was worth the effort. Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 24, 2016 22:30:32 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top She never said that. She said to lose the hero complex. "Mmmmmmmhmm." Leif went back to just lying there. Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 25, 2016 2:56:09 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top At this point in his life, he felt like the need to be a hero was all he had left. And even that was tenuous, because why even HAVE other agents when Mr. Wormhole was around. Hrm, strong for everybody vs. strong for himself, that's an interesting thought. Where was the difference? Still, the words were helpful, the idea she thought he was worth helping, especially when she had so much of her own troubles to sort out, even more so. As hard as the advice was to use, as much as everything hurt, he still appreciated it. Unsure what to say, he looked into the sky and thought about her words, and if he would ever see the Chicago sky again once he left. "I've figured out a few things I have to do before I go. I might not've been able to do 'em, if you hadn't said anything." Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 25, 2016 16:04:51 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Somebody had to, man. I'm not the bad guy, here, but I don't mind taking on thar role if it means helping someone out." Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 25, 2016 16:06:59 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Bad guy? You're nothing close." He didn't 100% agree, but bad guy? Please. « Last Edit: Feb 25, 2016 16:07:33 GMT -6 by Aaron Silverman » Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Feb 25, 2016 19:01:46 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Remember that," she said, rolling onto her other side. Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 4, 2016 8:12:07 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "I never thought you were, so don't worry, I will." Hell, every time they've met outside of a mission, she'd tried to help him, even when he least deserved help. She could be blunt, she said things he didn't agree with or wasn't sure he could live with, but she was going out of her way to do her part. Look at all this - he'd come to see her because she'd died a horrifying death, to check on her and comfort her if need be, and she'd still cared enough about his stupid problems to do what she could. He'd been like that, not long ago at all, and needed to reconnect with that part of himself. Seeing it in someone else drew a small, wistful chuckle from him as he stood up, let the February air hit his face. It wouldn't sound like it's directed at her, and if she looked over, she'd find he wasn't looking at her. "There isn't really time to fix everything before I go, but I do need to change. Get back to what I used to be. I can at least start, before they send me out. You should get some rest though, look like you really need it." Standing here jawing at her further about it probably wouldn't do much good. She'd done what she could, and he'd probably taken up enough of her time with this anyway. Why was he even feeling anything about this when there was a war on, so many innocent people who needed him to stand between them and the bad guys? Part of him wanted to stay sitting on the grass with her all day, find more ways to show his gratitude, just be around her. Though was that just clinging to anyone who would show him even a shred of kindness, even (especially?) the tough love kind she was giving out, after all that happened? Maybe. Maybe not. Either way, she had turned this around to being about him when he'd come for her, and touches of shame and anger at himself still flitted around in his mind about that. Plus, exhaustion radiated off her almost like a physical mass, as solid as the wall of darkness he'd used to crush that demon to death. So on he went, starting to walk off. Then he stopped, looking back to her hesitantly. "But hey, one last thing?" Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 4, 2016 12:20:23 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Yup?" She didn't bother to look up at him, still lying down on the grass. Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 4, 2016 12:33:23 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Well, Aaron? Out with it. You've taken up so much of her time already, and the two of you don't even know all that much about each other. Something to amend, and hopefully soon, but right now really doesn't feel like a good time. "If they send you off to fight, be careful, okay? I, um, I hope this doesn't sound weird, but you're a good person. I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to you." He didn't want anything bad to happen to anyone, except Clavish, but they didn't live in a world where that was possible. People were fighting and dying on the other side of the world as they spoke, and even beyond the war, there were so many problems on Earth he, currently, could do absolutely nothing about. Still, she'd been kind to him, she'd pulled him a little upwards from rock bottom. He'd have her back if they were ever out in the field together, but he could still wish her well for when they're not, and he really would hate it if something happened for real. Well, realer than that time warp bubble... thing. Besides, one way or another, he was going to convince people to let him go into Turkey, to help stop Clavish once and for all and finally free Sarah of that demon. Leif probably wasn't going to be there. « Last Edit: Mar 4, 2016 12:40:41 GMT -6 by Aaron Silverman » Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 4, 2016 13:22:56 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Oh. I'm going to war." With that, she turned her head, sapphire eyes hard and a wicked sort of smile across her face. If he looked close enough, he'd be able to see the glint of dog tags under her shirt before her fingers raised to grasp them tight in her hand. "I'll be all Gucci, man. I've been training for this. We're good." Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 5, 2016 16:37:21 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "I hope so. Hopefully we'll all be... Gucci?" Everyone'd been training for this. All of their guys, and all of the Empire's guys. And yet people were still going to get hurt, still going to die. The world was going to be washed with the blood of thousands, if not millions, and all he could do about it was try to protect as many as he could wherever they sent him. Sure, they had to think for the best, but he still worried about everyone. Leif might not be absolute top of that list, but she was very much up there. He was indeed looking closely enough to spot the dog tags, and noticed her suddenly grab them in one hand, but looked away after a second, back to her eyes. He didn't want to look like he was, you know, staring at her chest or anything - not only was he not that kind of guy, but this was the worst possible time to be checking people out. He did look curious about the tags, for a moment, but also as if not sure if it would be appropriate to ask. It's not like she went prying into why he was always wearing that same watch, after all. « Last Edit: Mar 5, 2016 16:46:59 GMT -6 by Aaron Silverman » Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 5, 2016 22:49:54 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Leif snickered openly when he tried to copy her vernacular, giving a shake of her head. It was whatever. Then, she caught his eyes, and the way he was looking at her. "What's up?" she asked with a furrow of her brows. Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 6, 2016 12:02:15 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Hm?" She noticed. Of course she noticed. What to say? Just admit curiosity? He couldn't just go all "nah, no idea what you're talking about," Leif wasn't stupid. And he wasn't a liar by nature. How to say anything without sounding like a weirdo? The furrow of her brow made him hesitate, but then he shrugged, tried to stay relaxed like she told him. "Nothing's up, at least, nothing bad. I was curious about something, but I was thinking about if I should ask. Not wanting to pry where I might not be welcome, and all that. Sorry." Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 6, 2016 14:03:49 GMT -6 via mobile » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Leif rolled her eyes, moving her head back into position and keeping the sun out of her face. "Dude, stop apologizing. Just ask. Questions aren't offensive. Not usually, anyways." Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 6, 2016 17:47:45 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top A month ago, before the wayward house, before he learnt what he had, he'd have said he was over doubting himself constantly, second guessing every little thing he did in every little interaction. He'd have had the confidence to just ask, outright. That wasn't the case any more, and the eyeroll almost made him just leave. Every move was the wrong move, and both overthinking and underthinking were problems. But then, maybe this was part of just relaxing, like she said. Just... being. He'd just never been good at shoving himself into what didn't feel like it was any of his business. That, and he had no idea what the question on his mind actually was. He was curious about that turn of phrase, and the dog tags, but how to ask about them without being rude? "I noticed the dog tags, found myself wondering about them. Is there a story there or anything?" Though he recalled how, the first time they met, she mentioned military family. Like her brother. But assuming it was a memento of some kind felt like a bit of a stretch - very possible, but he didn't want to jump to conclusions. Still, he phrased the question carefully, trying not to step on any potential live wires. Sure, she said questions weren't offensive, but he had a feeling in his gut he might be travelling into sensitive territory. Especially with the way she'd grabbed them, just after he caught the sun glinting off the metal. You don't treat something like that if it isn't valuable to you. For someone who'd helped him - or at least tried to help - so much, in both a light-hearted "wash the pain away with booze and drugs" way and a tough love "shit you need to hear and actually use" way, he didn't really know as much about her as he would like. Just that right now seemed a bad time to throw that at her, too. « Last Edit: Mar 6, 2016 18:06:55 GMT -6 by Aaron Silverman » Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Leif Adamson Agent In the Land of Gods and Monsters. [send pm] Joined: January 2016 Gender: Posts: 925 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 6, 2016 18:16:01 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top "Adamson, Neil K. Social security number. Taosim. AB Negative." She recited the information from memory, careful to keep the social security number private. Her face was neutral and impassive. "Date of death. March thirteenth of last year. Cause of death, combat oriented injuries on the field. Survived by both parents, two younger brothers... and his baby sister, Leif Adamson." Her fingers delicately stroked the dog tags she wore. Back to Top   Biography ;; Gasoline Aaron Silverman Legend Defense ... [send pm] Joined: November 2014 Posts: 3,701 Checkup (Leif) « Mar 7, 2016 3:18:54 GMT -6 » Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top ...And a memento it was, indeed. Aaron hated being right. Unconsciously, he took a step closer to her, though not enough to intrude upon personal space. It was just the instinct to be there for someone hurting, to comfort, to help. He didn't do anything, because he hadn't been asked to, but he was there. "I'm sorry for your loss." Quiet, soft, but genuine. That kind of pain cut deep, what followed Aaron around couldn't really match up to losing a family member like that. And there was Leif, about to go into the battlefield herself. Suddenly, he felt like even more of an ass for ever bringing her into his problems. Back to Top   Some things are worth fighting for, some feelings never die... Reply Share Thread Facebook Twitter Tumblr LinkedIn MySpace Email Go to Previous Thread Next Thread Please make a selection first